8) Splurging at the Scarlet Corset.
ENGLISH: Went gallivanting into the city today. Still raining. I don't think it's ever going to stop. Note to self; invest in submarine.
After Tommy Waffles and I had completed some errands we stopped by the Röda Korset--or as I like to call it--the Scarlet Korset. For those of my American or non-Swedish speaking cohorts Röda Korset translates simply to "The Red Cross" which exists in abundance all over the world, especially the states, among Good Will, Plato's Closet, and the like. Basically, it's a second hand shop with mostly crap, but limitless opportunities to discover some hidden treasures amongst the heaps of unwanted rubbish!
It was quite fun! Tommy snagged a really sweet jean jacket (for 30kr/4.75$) and a Pac Man vintage t-shirt (for 20kr/3$). I on the other hand snatched up a few scarfs, albeit frilly, were simply too irresistible to ignore and they were just 10kr a piece!!!1 SO I GOT THREE! A lilac plaid with hints of hot pink, a grayscale cheetah print, and a shiny almost tinsel like metallic blue and evergreen one. I even managed to pick up a simple pair of black gloves (also 10kr/1.50$) seeing as winter is creeping ever closer despite my attempts to avoid the inevitable frozen apocalypse that awaits many a viking offspring.
Annnnd...We FINALLY got us a proper computer desk! Very spiffy and (for 75kr/12$) it was a steal! SCORE!
Well, that's all for now, gonna snuggle up to Waffles and pass out on his face. Until next time, stay ridiculous!
SVENSKA: Korsetter är inte bara för bordeller! Så mycket billiga och grymma kläder så det känns som att stjäla! Du måste älska årgång.
6) Someone Has Slaughtered My Slumber Sheep! GAAAHH!!!
ENGLISH: THIS IS BLASPHEMY!!! I cannot sleep D: without properly being able to count my sheep as they jump ever so gracefully over my bed I cannot thus promplty konk out and unlock the golden gates to dreamland.
It's been like this for what seems like forever lately. No matter how hard I try to fix my days it seems like I don't go to bed till around 6-9am and don't wake up till 3-5pm. It's insanity!
Going to watch some TV with Tommy Waffles, hopefully that makes me tired. If that doesn't help I'll clean up around the apartment a little, hopefully that makes me tired. If that doesn't help I'll walk down to Konsum to buy some stamps so I can toss that letter I've been meaning to mail into the post, hopefully that makes me tired. If that doesn't help I'll go into the city with Tommy Waffles to accompany him as he drops off some papers, hopefully that makes me tired. IF NONE OF THAT WORKS I'M GONNA DIEEEEeeEEeeEe!! D:
Now, I'm off! Let's see how affective my plans to help me fall asleep actually are...dundunDUN!!!
SVENSKA: Kan inte somna. Det verkar som alla fåren är döda. Jag ska dö eller annars förvandlas till en nattuggla och sluka smådjur. AHHHH D:
5) On a Mission to Horde Some Foodz.
ENGLISH: Rain rain go away, come again another day. I love you rain, you're pretty, your raindrops soothing...But GTFO already!!! D:
It seems like it's been raining non stop for the past week now, maybe longer. I'm surprised we weren't forced to swim our way to the grocery store. Instead we walked, but my shoes were quick to getting soaked after prancing through the occasional puddle. They're unavoidable!!1 ;3;
So, Tommy Waffles and I took a stroll to the nearest grocery store with the intentions of purchasing some edible loots from the local NPCs. The rain had gotten to them too. Their brains had clearly absorbed the nearby drizzle which resulted in their groggy demeanor and their soggy noggins could only deliver the most generic of actions and phrases.
But I felt their pain. I too suffered somewhat from the same affliction. I miss the days of endless sunshine, slapping you in the face with a bucket of sweat, and blasting you with its solar rays.
But summer is gone now. Autumn is inching ever closer and before you know it winter will have set in and I will be lost somewhere under the heaps of snow. Ultimately, nobody will find my body until sometime next year, after the snow has melted, and my boney skeleton is discovered, clinging to whatever vegetation managed to survive the harsh blanket of winter ;____;
But enough of the BAWWWfesting. We can conclude with said previous dribble that Emery Strudel = Not a fan of snow and coldface. Now, LET'S EAT US SOME NACHOS!! Omnomnom!
SVENSKA: Regnet har en tendens att späda aktivitet och roliga tider. MenTommy och jag var hungrig, så ovilliga att gå i regnet, vi gick ut för att köpa mat så att vi kunde sätta några i våra magar. Det varen härlig resa.
3) Escaping Partytown.
ENGLISH: I'm not even...exactly certain...what the party was celebrating. A birthday, a promotion, the shitty weather, or the simple desire to get wasted amongst a horde of strangers. It was fun to meet up with Couch Bunny and partake in his drunken antics but the awkwardness of not knowing anyone else there aside from Tommy Waffles and Couch Bunny's sister Madde quickly resulted in the both of us wanting to press the eject button and go get a pizza.
We said our fairwells, avoided the gathering of drunken hipster boys trying desperately to get laid at a sausage fest, and sauntered off towards the direction of the closest pizzeria. Their score boards won't be seeing any attention tonight and I doubt any acheivements will be unlocked and conquered. Bummer for them but at least Couch Bunny was having a blast chugging all their free booze!
While Couch Bunny stayed behind to have enough fun for the three of us Tommy and I went back to my castle to indulge ourselves in the freshly baked pizza we had scattered off so desperately to get. Curled up and watched some movies and pretty much called it a night!
Not a very productive day I admit but it was definitely worth writing about or else this post just simply wouldn't exist.
SVENSKA: Jag och Tommy är alldeles för nördig för att spela rollen av Bimbo och sprit hund. Vi skutta ut för att få pizza och tillbringade resten av natten tittar på film. Couch Bunny är avstängd ha tillräckligt roligt för tre av oss ändå!
2) Party Like a Pornstar!
ENGLISH: Today has been a very tranquil day. Full of zen gardens and green tea. But then I woke up. Around 3pm or so. It's my lazy day. Don't hate the pillow snuggler!
But sleep is for the tired and the comatose. So now I'm busying myself with cuddling up to the enfamous Tommy Waffles and resisting all urges to drench him in maple syrup and devour him. Sadly, he is not nearly as edible as the popular breakfast pastry he so represents.
But our day is just about to get even more exciting! Couch Bunny should be strolling by soon and whisking us off to a magical adventure. Full of booze, drunken bimbos, and over friendly man hands. Sweden's youth culture although repetitive in nature can be quite amusing. Especially if you add your own subtitles.
SVENSKA: Jag sover som en ide björn monster. Men jag festa som en G-rankade porrstjärna. Rock hard allt du berusad swedelings! Det roliga är bara att komma igång!
1) Greetings Internet Hooligans!
ENGLISH: This is just a test. That numbing sensation tingling your frontal cortex and slowly frying your brain cells thus inevitably diminishing your IQ is the ever looming boredom that brought you here and it is the very same thing that will keep you here. Coming back occasionally; whenever it tickles your fancy. Out of curiousity, intrigue, or simply because you CAN! No matter, it's worth it. It's not like you were going to become a rocket scientist anyway ;p
Now, remember to keep your gaudishly over manicured plastic claws inside the ride at all times and don't forget....to be yourself! Because only youz guis can make me giggle like an incessant little school girl.
SVENSKA: Hej fjortisar och hallickar! Välkommen till min blogg, inte slicka tapeten, och kom ihåg oavsett hur löjliga ni är så upphör ni människor aldrig att underhålla. Tack för att ni checka in!
